Cat cafes nothing to miaow about

Having only become a cat owner in the last two years, I’m fairly new to the catolic cult.

But it didn’t take long for my obsession with all things pussbyterian to take off.

That’s why I made it my mission to find the best cat cafes in Japan – a country that’s taken off as a leader in what’s become a global trend since the opening of the first cat cafe in Taiwan in 1998.

Japan is also the nation that exports the number one supply of cuteness to the rest of the world in the form of Hello Kitty, so I was pretty certain the cats of Japan were going to be right up there on the adorable scale.

I excitedly imagined the cafe cats sitting on my lap, purring around my ankles and showering me with their affection.

My expectations were high, I know, but I was sure I’d be sharing tea with a carefully selected group of feline friends of the highest order.

My first visit to a cat cafe wasn’t actually a cat cafe, but rather an indoor petting zoo in Osaka.

By the word zoo, I’m talking a few small rooms filled with an unusual menagerie of cats, dogs, kangaroos, a pig, an iguana and a lama.

But I was just there for the cats.

Some of them seemed a bit fed up.

Flat ears and a hiss do not translate to “pat me” in the catolic language.

This seemed to be lost on some visitors, who persisted with their pats, but I decided this wasn’t quite the experience I was after.

So I scoped out the Wan Nyan Chu cat cafe in Shijo-Kawaramachi, a shopping district in Kyoto.

There I was, hands sanitised, mandatory Japanese slippers on, a mango juice on the table, ready for some cat time.

And there they were, eight or so cats. All fast asleep.

I thought of buying some treats and a milky drink to draw their attention.

But their gazes through half-open blinking eyes told me that they were totally uninterested in anything I had to offer.

I was just another person intruding on their eight-hour napping schedule.

Disappointment ensued, but I wasn’t ready to give up.

I’d heard the residents at the Calico Cat Cafe in Tokyo were rather friendly, so I dragged my partner there for one last attempt to live out my dream of being nuzzled by some furry friends.

But once again, I’d paid the equivalent of about $A10 to spend time with cats no more special than my Persian at home.

Looking back, it was pretty irrational to think that the cats of Japan would be better than my own.

I mean, Hello Kitty isn’t even a cat!

In fairness, the cats were a nice bunch, and some were even rather stunning.

They all seem well cared for and were never short of a pat.

But your own flea-bag at home is probably a lot sweeter, and you can watch him or her sleep for free.

If you go: Tempozan Anipa petting zoo: tempozan Marketplace, Osaka Wan Nyan Chu: Shijo-Kawaramachi shopping district, Kyoto Calico Cat Cafe: Shinjuku, Kabukicho, 1 Chome-18-7, Tokyo.

Photo by Patrice Alsteen.

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